賈平凹：吃煙 On Smoking

最新 03-21

吃煙

文/賈平凹譯/胡宗鋒

本文經兩位老師授權在「微風讀書會」首發

On Smoking

Translated from the Chinese by Hu Zong feng & Robin Gilbank

吃煙是只吃不進，屬藝術的食品和藝術的行為，應該為少數人享用，如皇宮寢室中的黃色被褥，警察的電棒，失眠者的安定片；現在吃煙的人卻太多，所以得禁止。

Smoking mimics the act of eating only nothing passes into your guts. It is a form of connosieurship akin to art appreciation and fine cuisine. Like the bed chambers in the imperial palace, the stun guns used by police officers, and the tranquillisers used by insomniacs, it existsto be used by the few. Nowadays, there are too many smokers and it should be outlawed.

禁止哮喘病患者吃煙，哮喘本來痰多，吃煙咳咳咔咔的，壞煙的名節。禁止女人吃煙，煙性為火，女性為水，水火生來不相容的。禁止醫生吃煙，煙是火之因，醫是病之因，同都是因，犯忌諱。禁止兔唇人吃煙，他們噙不住香煙。禁止長鬍須的人吃煙，煙囪上從來不長草的。

A tiny minority would still be permitted to smoke. They would be allowed to live like the Bodhisattva. All day long censers in front ofthe Buddha statue exhale perfumed clouds, so that he is a fellow smoker. Smokers can jig together with the skunk, which secretes itself in its warren until the stench proves unbearable. Those addicts keep silent together with the turtles. The turtle smoke until its shell is stained sallow. They can also whinny together with the donkeys. Behold, both tuck their pipes about their waists when not inuse, but the donkey』s is humongous!

留下了吃煙的少部分人，他們就與菩薩同在，因為菩薩像前的香爐里終日香煙裊裊，菩薩也是吃煙的。與黃鼠狼子同舞，黃鼠狼子在洞里，煙一熏就出來了。與龜同默，龜吃煙吃得蓋殼都焦黃焦黃。還可以與驢同嚎，瞧呀，驢這老煙鬼將多麼大的煙袋鍋兒別在腰裡！

我是吃煙的，屬相上為龍，雲要從龍，才吃煙吞吐煙霧要做雲的。我吃煙的原則是吃時不把煙分散給他人，寧肯給他人錢，錢宜散不宜聚，煙是自焚身亡的忠義之士，卻不能讓與的。而且我堅信一方水土養一方人，是中國人就吃中國煙，是本地人就吃本地煙，如我數年裡只吃「猴王」。

A tiny minority would still be permitted to smoke. Theywould be allowed to live like the Bodhisattva. All day long censers in front ofthe Buddha statue exhale perfumed clouds, so that he is a fellow smoker. Smokerscan jig together with the skunk, which secretes itself in its warren until thestench proves unbearable. Those addicts keep silent together with the turtles. Theturtle smoke until its shell is stained sallow. They can also whinny togetherwith the donkeys. Behold, both tuck their pipes about their waists when not inuse, but the donkey』s is humongous!

I am a smoker. I was born in the Year of the Dragon. Clouds circulate around the dragon. He can only generate these after swallowing smoke.My principle of smoking is that I don』t pass out cigarettes to others; I would rather give them money. For it is good to spread out money rather than hoardit. Tobacco is a kind of loyal and faithful retainer who would rather he himself burnt to death. Thus, one should not offer it to others. I firmly believe that man is the product of his environment. Chinese people should smoke Chinese cigarettes. Local people should smoke locally-produced tobacco. For instance, I』ve stuck to the Shaanxi-made Monkey King for years.

杭州的一個寺里有幅門聯，是：「是命也是運也，緩緩而行；為名乎為利乎，坐坐再去。」忙忙人生，坐下來幹啥，坐下來吃煙。

A couplet on the architraves of a temple in Hangzhoustates:

「Whether through fate or luck, persist in your lifeslowly

Whether for money or for fame, sit here and thenleave.」

In the midst of a busy life,why should people sit down? Just sit down and smoke.

1996年11月26日夜戲筆