LGBTQ 我的名字叫Charlie

最新 07-31

LoveRediscover

公眾號ID：loverediscover

一起為LGBTQ Equality吶喊

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「

我們是LoveRediscover。

分享LGBT真實故事，為LGBT community傳遞聲音。

愛就是愛。美麗，驕傲，平等。

」

My Story

我的故事

我在2016年年初加入了一個叫「自殺小組」的群聊，這是一個旨在互相支持的小組。那個時候我的身份一直困擾著我，在那個群聊里，我交了很多朋友。我開始瀏覽各種性別，但是我討厭被某個性別所標記。

我群聊里的朋友幫助我告訴我媽媽我是一個雙性戀。我媽否認了。幾個月後，我有點放棄尋找自己的性別，現在我一點也不關心。

我的性別對我來說一直是個很大的困擾，我一點也不像女孩，反而想成為一個假小子。我在第三年的時候剪去了我的頭髮，想讓它變得短一點。我在群聊里的那段時間，我說我自己是流性人，同時我與一個也說自己是流性人的女孩Hayley建立了緊密的關係。在我認識她之前，我不知道多少次打電話給兒童教養熱線告訴他們我曾經想要勒死自己或者至少拿一條未繫緊的皮帶勒住自己的脖子。我媽媽於是帶我去找了輔導員。

我告訴Hayley，我是一個跨性別男孩，然後我給自己取名叫Charlie，那是電影壁花少年裡的男主角。我最先把這件事情告訴了我的第一個朋友Ellie，她非常慷慨地接受了這一切，並且瘋狂地對我非常友善。後來我與一個女孩Issie成為了朋友。

Hayley，Issie和我，我們三個曾經在很多個月里非常親密，直到幾個月前我搞砸了這一切，我們自那以後再也沒有說過話。

我的名字是Charlie

而且我一直是個男孩

——來自故事敘述者Charlie

我和一個跨性別男孩Pedro是很親密的朋友。群聊並沒有解決什麼問題，但是我現在和一群更棒的人還有一個更活躍的聊天群了。

我現在還沒有告訴我家裡人，但每當lgbt+的話題出現，我已經開始有足夠的自信去表達我的觀點。我在學校里也有一個跨性別的朋友，我經常會去找他聊天。我通過文化以及電視秀和他建立起了親密的關係。

雖然我的生活過得並不是很好，但是網路在各個方面都幫助了我很多，它幫助我意識到了我自己的身份，它幫助我交了許多朋友。今天晚上的時候我哥哥告訴我跨性別者根本不是真的，但是我網路上朋友都笑我哥哥很傻。我很愛他們。

（向上滑動閱讀英文原文）

△ My story.

I joined a group chat at the beginning of last year (2016) called Suicide squad. It was meant to be a support chat. At the time I had been struggling with my identity. I made tons of new friends. I began almost browsing through sexualities but found that i hated being labelled like that. My friends on the group chat helped me tell my mum i was bi. She denied it. A few months later I kinda gave up on finding a sexuality and now i don"t care. My gender had always been a big question for Me i was never girly and wanted to be a tomboy. I had cut my hair in year 3 to have it short. At the time of the group chat I said i was genderfluid and i bonded with this girl hayley who also said she was genderfluid. I am unsure about times but before i met her i told childline that i had tried to hang myself or at least pressed an untied belt to my neck and my mum took me to a counsellor. I told hayley I was a trans boy and named myself Charlie after the main character from the perks of being A wallflower. I told my first friend Ellie this first. She took it well and was insanely kind about it. I made friends with a girl Issie. Hayley, Issie and I were super close for months until a couple months ago when I fucked up and we havent talked since. I am close friends with a boy Pedro who is also trans. The group chat did not work out but now I have a more active chat with a range of awesome people. I haven"t come out to my family but have began to be confident enough to voice my opinions Whenever lgbt+ matters come up. I have a trans friend at school who i talk to often to avoid pe and we have bonded through memes and tv shows. My life isnt going so well but the internet has helped me in many ways from helping me realise my identity to helping me make friends. Tonight my brother said that being transgender isnt a real thing but my internet friends managed to make me laugh at his stupidity. I love them all so much.