中外最精彩的40條神回復，快來看看有沒有你的心頭好？

在網上給大家搜羅了一些最精彩的神回復，內容遍及知乎、微博、Buzzfeed 等等等等，一起來看看。

01

中國哪裡的姑娘最漂亮？

Where can you find the most beautiful girls in China?

「

微信朋友圈

WeChat Moments

」

02

請給出一句很有內涵的詩句

Please name a thought-provoking sentence from a poem.

「

一懶眾衫小

Once lazy, all your clothes get smaller.

」

03

如何理解「窮不是一種狀態」？

What"s the meaning of "poverty is not a certain situation"?

「

窮是一種常態

It"s the common situation.

」

04

問世上不會游泳的動物是？

What animals on earth can not swim?

「

媳婦和媽

Your wife and your mother.

」

05

如果被車撞飛10米遠，

爬起來之後說什麼最帥？

What is the coolest thing to say after you got hit by a car and managed to stand up again?

「

下一輛

Next!

」

06

媽，我是你的什麼？

Mother, what am I to you?

「

媽的智障

My karma.

」

07

為什麼前女友還會一直關注我呢？

What could be the reason that my ex still follows me on social networks?

「

知道你過得不好我也就放心了

Knowing that you still mess everything up makes my day.

」

08

為什麼打群架的時候

普遍會脫掉上衣？

Why do people usually take off their clothes when starting a gang fight?

「

假如脫掉褲子的話

總覺得有哪裡不對，氣氛怪怪的

Because it would be weird to take off your pants.

」

09

怎麼反駁「你行你上啊」的邏輯？

How should I respond to "You can you up"?

「

我評論個雞蛋不好吃，還得自己下個蛋啊？

So I need to lay an egg to criticize an egg"s flavor?

」

10

如何一個月減肥40斤？

By what means can I lose 20 kilograms in a month?

「

截肢

Amputation.

」

11

怎樣含蓄地表達

「我已經被收買了」

How can I subtly suggest that I"ve been compromised?

「

我說句公道話……

Let me say this impartially...

」

12

為什麼你長痘痘？

Why do you have pimples?

「

因為我可愛得冒泡

Because I"m just bubble-bubbly cute.

」

13

打雷的時候關窗戶有用嗎？

Does it work to close the window when it"s thundering outside?

「

沒用的，我試過了

關了窗雷一樣在打

No, it won"t. I"ve tried.

It was still thundering outside after I closed the window.

」

14

你見過哪些概率極小極小的事件？

What extremly-small-probability event have you witnessed?

「

20道完形填空，全錯

Done a cloze test of 20 questions

with 0 answer right.

」

15

妹子還書的時候夾了一張面巾紙

什麼意思？

What does a girl mean when she return your book but with a facial tissue in it?

「

說明你對人家有意思

This means you are paying extra attention to her.

」

16

兩千元人民幣，想出國窮游

可以去哪些國家？

To which country can I do a budget travel with 2,000 RMB?

「

秦魯齊蜀韓鄭魏楚趙燕吳等等...

For example,

all the ancient countries that used to be China.

」

17

想養一隻鸚鵡

教它說一些什麼話好？

I wanna keep a parrot as pet. What would be cool to teach it to say?

「

救命，我被變成鸚鵡了！

Help!

They"ve turned me into a parrot!

」

18

呆萌和腦殘的界限是？

What is the boundry between "clumsy" and "stupid"?

「

和

the and

」

19

為什麼女生有體香，而男生沒有？

Why do women give out sweet scent but men don"t?

「

化妝品腌入味了

The makeup is fermenting.

」

20

男生說什麼話

女生會覺得很大氣？

What would be manly for a man to say in front of a girl?

「

買

I"ll pay.

」

21

熱戀是一種怎樣的體驗？

How does it feel to love somebody insanely?

「

兩個長得像豬一樣的人

還怕對方被搶走了。。

Two people who are on no aspect attractive worry about each other being stolen by someone else.

」

22

有什麼讚揚讓你比較尷尬？

Is there any compliment that makes you awkward?

「

人不可貌相啊

We really cannot judge a book by its cover, can we?

」

23

你怎麼一個人逛街啊？

Why are you shopping all by yourself?

「

半個人逛街我怕嚇著你

I fear it would scare you to death if I were shopping all by no one.

」

24

單身兩年以上是什麼體驗？

How does it feel to be single for more than 2 years?

「

單身22年

不知道你說的是哪兩年？

I"ve been single for 22 years.

Which 2 years are you suggesting?

」

25

地球外面那一層叫什麼？

How do you call the outside layer of Earth?

「

香飄飄奶茶

Xiang Piao Piao milk tea.

」

26

要是在古代

姐的顏值能撐起整個青樓

Back in the ancient times, a face like mine can hold a whole brothel.

「

你是說你長得像柱子嗎？

You mean you look like a pillar?

」

27

很高興為你服務

I"m glad to be at your service.

「

你高興得太早了

You"ll find out you got glad too fast.

」

28

北冥有魚，其名為鯤

Once in the northern sea, there was a fish and people called it Kun.

「

眾人食之，完

And people ate it.

The end.

」

29

媽，我能看電視嗎？

Mom, can I watch the television?

「

當然可以啊，只要不打開就行

Of course you can, as long as it"s turned off.

」

30

你得揣摩出題人的意圖

You need to understand why they set this question in the first place.

「

他想我死

They want me dead.

」

31

你知道嗎？你最終會變成你討厭的人

You know what? You eventually become someone you loathe.

「

借你吉言，我討厭有錢人

Thanks, I loathe people who are rich.

」

32

國慶去北京旅遊有什麼好建議嗎？

Gonna be traveling in Beijing during the National Day vacation. Any suggestion?

「

別去

Don"t go.

」

33

等我瘦了就回來找你

I"ll come back for you when I get slim.

「

如果你不想見我，其實可以直說

You can level with me if you don"t want to see me.

」

34

有史以來最偉大的虛構人物是誰？

Who is the greatest fictional character in history?

「

別人家的小朋友

Someone else"s child.

」

35

你看看別人家的男朋友

都是吃女朋友吃剩下的飯！！！

Look at other girls" boyfriends. They eat their grilfriends" leftover.

「

那你倒是給我剩點啊

Sounds as if you ever left any over.

」

36

為什麼秀恩愛通常選擇在中午？

Why do people always show off their relationships at noon?

「

因為早晚會有報應

Because sooner or later karma will come to them.

」

37

請用一個詞來形容你的男朋友

Please use one word to describe your boyfriend.

「

哪？

Where?

」

38

被人追了怎麼拒絕？

How do I successfully reject someone who is pursuing me?

「

接地卸妝

Remove your makeup,right now, right there.

」

39

為了讓你好好學習，父母都給過你什麼？

What did your parents give you to make you study harder?

「

這張臉

This face.

」

40

參觀一個世界奇觀時

你最想了解哪些信息？

What do you want to know the most when you visit a World Wonder?

「

這附近有什麼好吃的嗎？

What can I find to eat around there?

」

41

我要如何才能顯得很高冷？

How can I look high-end and cool?

「

搬去喜馬拉雅

Move to the Himalayas.

」

42

為什麼有的男生追女生追到一半不追了？

Why do some boys give up half-way pursuing a girl?

「

你倒是給個進度條啊

Why don"t you display a progress bar?

」

43

為什麼在洗完澡之後

有些人會覺得自己變漂亮了？

Why do some people find themselves prettier after they take a shower?

「

腦子進水了

The brain has water damage.

」

話說，

你心中最精彩的神回復有上榜嗎？

如果沒有的話，你的心頭好是什麼？

快來留言區和大家分享一下吧。

——END——

一切精彩 ，盡在花一派有贊商城

有花有愛丨花一派

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