20個讓你碉堡的瞬間，學哲學必看！

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學習哲學的20個特徵

20 Signs You Studied Philosophy In College

1

每次寫論文就是醬紫啦

This is how you felt every time you wrote an essay.

2

這就是傳說中的【邏輯吐】

Logic trees make you want to cry

3

這讓廈大和川美的教授情何以堪？

One too many debates about the meaning of life made you become best friends with your tutor

4

哈，你害怕他成為你永遠的最好的朋友，那啥？

But now you』re scared he』s got a new BFF

5

維特根斯坦鴨兔頭，完勝成都老媽兔頭，耶！

You never want to see this duck rabbit again

6

哲學書就是好，解我糾結心頭爽！

You felt like this every time an article nullified your argument.

7

咦，維特還有點小性感嘛

You kinda find Wittgenstein a bit sexy

8

【我錯了】老闆總是這樣子的啦

This is what your tutors said to you every time you spoke

9

我過去常常想...生活的意義就是---HANPPY

You used to think…

10

但現在我意識到...無所謂...無所謂...我愛楊坤

But now you』ve realised…

11

你掙脫了朗朗小提琴靡靡之音

You』d totally unplug yourself from JJ Thomson』s violinist

12

是的，生活是一場夢

Yep. Life』s probably a dream

13

一個巨大的，找不到工作的美夢

One big, unemployed dream.

14

如果一棵樹倒了砸到你丫一隻螞蟻，我沒聽到，關我屁事

If a tree fell and you didn』t hear it, YOU JUST WOULDN』T CARE

15

一切皆虛無，學位算哪根蔥

It doesn』t matter that your degree counts for nothing, because nothing exists anyway

16

哇，我懂得好多耶，好偉大耶！

You know all this information…

17

自從有了維基百科，我再也不用翻書了

… because you』ve been on Wikipedia...

This website meant you never had to open a book.

18

曾經，有一份真誠的愛情放在我面前， 我沒有珍惜，

等到我失去的時候才後悔莫及...

You』ve had this conversation 500 times

19

嗯，好吧，給你三年時間，想想你為什麼會窮---跪了，我的女神！我再也不玩哲學了！

You might be poor, but at least you got to spend three years thinking about what that might be like

20

歡迎回到現實世界！賽博空間的宮民們！

Oh hai there, life

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